May 7, 2018

Written by John Spickes

Linguistic Misattribution

One of the skills that I have been practicing in my study of NVC, mindfulness, and rationality is what is variously called “original seeing”, or “seeing with fresh eyes”. It is the skill of observing a thing simply, as though for the first time, with the intention of seeing the thing as it really is. This involves shutting down one’s automatic thought processes, and avoiding the application of judgments that come to us naturally.

Tags:  language ,  nvc ,  rationality

Jun 9, 2017

Written by John Spickes

Family HEART Camp 2016

I want to share an experience that my family had for the first time in June 2016, and which I think will become a fixture in our lives for the foreseeable future. I’m talking about an event called Family HEART Camp. It is rather difficult to describe this experience briefly. It’s also hard to describe without sounding … well … maybe a bit crazy. People often exaggerate and use superlatives inappropriately.

Tags:  nvc

Mar 20, 2016

Written by John Spickes

The Cause of Emotion

“He made me angry.” This is a common way of talking in modern western society. We talk as though our emotions are directly caused by external stimuli. It’s simple stimulus and response. In this example, some action “he” has taken has caused my anger; and in real life it often feels like this is what happens. The cause (his action) occurs very shortly before the effect (my anger), and if he hadn’t taken his action, I wouldn’t be angry.

Tags:  stoicism ,  nvc ,  philosophy

Mar 8, 2016

Written by John Spickes

Invest Your Emotions Wisely

This was written as a guest post for the blog Advancing to Greater. I hope you’ll give it a read. Thanks for the invitation, Rich! Some things are under our control, while others are not. This is one of the core teachings of the ancient philosophy of Stoicism: that we should be always aware of which things are inside our control, and which things are outside. What purpose does it serve to maintain an awareness of the limits of our control?

Tags:  philosophy ,  stoicism

Mar 8, 2016

Written by John Spickes

A New Approach

I want to try a different approach to my online interactions. I’ve played with Facebook for a while, and I’ve decided, for now anyway, that it’s not my thing. Other social media seem to have similar problems. Fighting Conversations on Facebook are too often heated. Maybe it’s that everything is open - all conversations potentially have an audience. Maybe that drives people to feel that they must “win” every argument.

Tags:  blog ,  internet ,  focus

Mar 8, 2016

Written by John Spickes

Trying Hugo

I’m giving Hugo a try. Why? I want my files. I like them to be here, on my machine, editable offline, going with me wherever I go. I like Markdown. I like my files to be in a format I can easily read and edit. I like being able to easily move my content elsewhere when I change my mind. And I will. Markdown is easy to read and convert.

Tags:  blog

Dec 1, 2014

Written by John Spickes

End of Stoic Week 2014

What follows is a journal entry I wrote on December 1, 2014. I kind of half-assed my way through Stoic week, and certainly didn’t give it the effort it deserved. My excuse is that I was trying to be a good parent, and neglected the Stoic Week practice for that. Anyway, I do feel I came away with some useful nuggets. One of Stoicism’s main ideas is to be conscious of what’s under your control and what isn’t.

Tags:  philosophy ,  stoicism

Nov 13, 2014

Written by John Spickes

I'm Scared of Net Neutrality

My unpopular opinion of the day: I’m scared of Net Neutrality. I have no doubt that this seems positively outlandish to many people, so let me explain. Of course I’m for good internet service, and all that. I don’t want my ISP direct my traffic to services they’d prefer I visit, or restrict what I can do, or any of that. I’m totally for freedom on the internet. So, you may ask, what am I worried about?

Tags:  politics

Oct 27, 2014

Written by John Spickes

Papa's Tool Box

Over the weekend I was working in the garage, and I came across an old tool box that I inherited from my grandfather. We called him Papa. I remember him often working on some engine or other, for his boat, or his lawn mower, or his truck. His hands were often a little greasy as I remember him. I set about sorting through the contents of this old, rusted tool box.

Tags:  life